Learning to Love My Self

These are two pictures of me. One leaning back and one sitting up. Normally I would never post the one sitting up with belly rolls.

My whole life I hated my body. I'm not curvy. My shoulders are wide and my hips are narrow. I don't have a waistline. My boobs sag. My butt isn't as big as others. I'm not sexy. I don't look like those girls in playboy or any of those other magazines.

That was my "story". And I believed EVERY SINGLE WORD! It's the bullshit story we learn from society and our parents and the media. No more! I'm over comparing myself to others. I am over media and the movie and modeling industry setting the standards for what's beautiful! It's just another way to separate us.

I am 46 years old and my body is different than yours. So is my story. I know I look healthier than some people but this is my body and to me, I am not in the shape I want to be in. I did Crossfit for two years and was in the best shape of my life and stopped going because of my neck pain. So I've lost quite a bit of my muscle I worked so hard for. So the shape I am in now is not as good as it was. I have beat myself up mentally and emotionally for it for 4 months. I say terrible things to myself: "Look at all the fat on my belly!!!" "My ass is gone!" "Ugh! Look at my legs giggling!" Horrible things! It has to stop. And here's how....

My new story is one of acceptance and self love. I've been trying something new and I'm inviting you to do it with me. I'm standing in my mirror and accepting and loving my body. Even my belly rolls! Lol. Seriously. I am saying wonderful things to myself and about my body. And I'm going to continue to do it until I love me. All of me. Because I know that this body is simply a vessel that houses what's most important, me(the soul) and my beautiful heart.💚 I want to honor and take great care of my vessel but looking at and speaking to it like its a piece of crap isn't motivating it to serve me or my higher purpose here.

I invite you to join me on a new journey of true love and self acceptance. And getting into the shape because it makes us feel great and healthy! Not just look better for others acceptance.

I see you. I love you. You deserve to be happy!!! And healthy!